I’ve been watching a lot of videos of Tina Turner this week. She is so awesome. Other people seem to be focusing on her voice or her hits or her legs or her hair, but I’m focusing on how she kept reinventing her life and writing her own ticket for how she wanted to live. She didn’t let society (or Ike) limit who she was. She didn’t let trauma define her. I want to be like Tina. I want us … read more »
How to Win at Divorce (and Life) … IMHO
A few weeks ago, I attended an online conference called “How to Win At Divorce.” This seemed like a strange proposition. After all, what does it mean to “win” at divorce?? Honestly, I thought the presentations would all be about how to get as much out of your ex as possible, positioning them as the enemy. Thankfully, that’s not what they did. But it made me really think about the question. (Ok, I just asked Chat GPT how to win … read more »
The Fight!
My CUNY Law students had a fight in class last week. 😡 We were talking about a case that’s before the Supreme Court challenging the Indian Child Welfare Act (more about that another time) and one of the students brought up a case that’s been in the news of a US soldier who abducted an Afghani baby girl. Another student said, “There’s an argument to be made that a girl will have a better upbringing in the US than in … read more »
Who Gets the Benefit of the Doubt?
My sister-in-law posted a piece by DEI trainer Madison Butler on LinkedIn this week that started, “I always keep the receipts. As a Black woman, I feel compelled to keep every receipt, document everything I do, preserve every paper trail. I delete nothing. I throw nothing away … When Black women talk about racism, homophobia or other abuses we deal with, people demand to see the receipts. That is the writing of someone who does not expect to be given … read more »
Compassionate lawyer??? Wha??
Compassionate lawyer??? Doesn’t that sound like an oxymoron? How do those 2 words go together? I’m learning about branding. That is my new tag. OK, let’s take a step back. In one of my past lives, when I was young and was trying to figure out how to make a positive impact on the world, I studied world religions in the Masters program at Harvard Divinity School. Although it was an amazing experience in many ways, I couldn’t figure out … read more »
PS – Thanks for the Invitation!
I’ve taken to watching TikTok videos to wind down before I go to sleep. I love the music and the stupid dad jokes and the dancing and the cute dog videos (have you seen scruffabella?). But I’ve also started watching Cory Booker, who shares stories about kindness and compassion after his morning run. This video is about 9 seconds. It’s for those among us who are confronted by people who get on our last nerve. For those who spend time … read more »
Did Will Smith have an amygdala hijack?
That is what psychologist Daniel Goleman has described as the fight or flight response. The amygdala, a tiny almond shaped structure in our brains, sometimes acts almost reflexively. When a lion is after you, the theory goes, you don’t have time to make a thoughtful, considered decision. It’s time to go! Chris Rock was not a lion – and Will Smith wasn’t in physical danger. But Will Smith obviously felt so threatened that he had to do something about it … read more »
Breaking the news to the kids
Are you the child of a divorce? If so, do you remember when you realized that your parents were separating? My guess is that you do.What do you remember about it–Do you remember what room you were in? Or what you heard? What did you feel? Who comforted you? What was said? Did your parents tell you or did you overhear something? Was it in the context of an argument or was it presented to you calmly? Did your parents … read more »
Trust but Verify
I have a question for you – where do you go for advice? If you’re like me, I’m sure you’re saying … Google! But where on Google? How do you know which sites are trustworthy? Now, I can hear you saying, “it depends what I want to know…”. Yes, that’s true for me, too! For instance, when I want to buy a new purchase (like a new web camera or a mattress or a tea kettle), I look at Consumer … read more »
It’s Too Darn Hot!
The other day I was on the phone with a friend who was in the Napa Valley. All of the sudden, we got cut off and couldn’t connect back for a long while. When she finally was able to call me back, she said, “My phone was too hot! It said I could make emergency phone calls only.” It was 103 degrees there!! Ahh, climate change! What if we had the same kind of internal emergency warning sign when our … read more »