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How to Win at Divorce (and Life) … IMHO

May 22, 2023 By Joy Rosenthal

A few weeks ago, I attended an online conference called “How to Win At Divorce.”  This seemed like a strange proposition.  After all, what does it mean to “win” at divorce?? Honestly, I thought the presentations would all be about how to get as much out of your ex as possible, positioning them as the enemy. Thankfully, that’s not what they did.  But it made me really think about the question. (Ok, I just asked Chat GPT how to win … read more »

Filed Under: conflict resolution, Divorce, General, Mindfulness, Negotiation, Nonviolence Tagged With: compassion, conflict, divorce, listening, negotiating, understanding

PS – Thanks for the Invitation!

August 29, 2022 By Joy Rosenthal

I’ve taken to watching TikTok videos to wind down before I go to sleep.  I love the music and the stupid dad jokes and the dancing and the cute dog videos (have you seen scruffabella?).  But I’ve also started watching Cory Booker, who shares stories about kindness and compassion after his morning run.  This video is about 9 seconds.   It’s for those among us who are confronted by people who get on our last nerve.  For those who spend time … read more »

Filed Under: conflict resolution, Divorce, General, Negotiation, Nonviolence Tagged With: inner voice, negotiating, Self Care

Did Will Smith have an amygdala hijack?  

April 1, 2022 By Joy Rosenthal

That is what psychologist Daniel Goleman has described as the fight or flight response.  The amygdala, a tiny almond shaped structure in our brains, sometimes acts almost reflexively.  When a lion is after you, the theory goes, you don’t have time to make a thoughtful, considered decision.  It’s time to go! Chris Rock was not a lion – and Will Smith wasn’t in physical danger.  But Will Smith obviously felt so threatened that he had to do something about it … read more »

Filed Under: conflict resolution, General, Negotiation, Nonviolence Tagged With: conflict, Dignity, negotiating, understanding

Lawyers Make Things Worse!

June 14, 2021 By Joy Rosenthal

“Lawyers make things worse!” I sometimes say to my clients.  “They can take people who are this far apart,” I say with my hands about 4 inches away from each other, “and make them this far apart by the time they’re through!” continuing with my hands still facing each other but my arms stretched about 3 feet away. This may seem like blasphemy coming from a lawyer!  And I mean no disrespect to my colleagues – but it’s part of … read more »

Filed Under: Clients, Divorce, General, Negotiation Tagged With: divorce, law, lawyers, negotiating

Layers of Sound

April 23, 2021 By Joy Rosenthal

I have been meditating for a few years, and was part of a workshop recently where the facilitator had us listen to “layers of sound.”  I didn’t understand what she was talking about at first.  It sounded a little mysterious, and a little woo woo…. But I decided to try what she was asking.  And it’s not hard – I’ll show you. (This is an interactive blog post!) Listen – right now – first, to the sounds that are farthest … read more »

Filed Under: Divorce, General, Mediation, Mindfulness, Negotiation, Nonviolence Tagged With: common ground, compassion, conflict, inner voice, listening, mediation, negotiating

Prenup? That’s Good News!

July 25, 2017 By Joy Rosenthal

Prenup? That’s Good News! by Joy Rosenthal

Your wedding day is only a few months off and your fiancé nervously mentions that he would like a prenuptial agreement. You are taken off guard. “But don’t you trust me?” you cry.   “It’s not that,” he stammers. “It’s just that, that I will be disowned if I don’t…”   Or, “It’s just that I have worked so hard on creating my own business, and I want things to be clear with my business partners…”   Or, “It’s just … read more »

Filed Under: Marriage, Prenuptial Tagged With: marriage, negotiating, pre-nup

A Lesson from Tangier

August 25, 2010 By Joy Rosenthal

I just came back from vacation in Spain. As part of our adventure, my husband and I took a train from Sevilla to the south coast, and a ferry across the Strait of Gibraltar to Tangier, Morocco. We only stayed overnight, but in that short time, I learned a lesson. The guidebooks warn you about the hustlers who see the tourist as an easy target. For that reason, many tourists only come for a day trip, hiring guides in advance … read more »

Filed Under: Cultural Competence, Negotiation, Travel Tagged With: common ground, compassion, inclusivity, listening, negotiating, understanding

Secrecy in Collaborative Law

March 21, 2009 By Joy Rosenthal

Two people, a man and a woman, came to me separately in the past week to explore the possibility of doing collaborative law.  Both were people in short term marriages with no kids.   The real estate wasn’t really the issue.   And so it seemed that their situations were relatively simple, and that the collaborative process would be relatively simple.  But scratching the surface made me see nuances that would not make the case appropriate.   The man asked … read more »

Filed Under: General Tagged With: collaborative process, law, lawyers, negotiating

Either/Or or Both/And?

May 28, 2008 By Joy Rosenthal

My friends and I used to talk about a concept of “both/and” as opposed to “either/or.”  What we meant was that, when making group decisions, we could look for solutions that were good for the group as a whole – and therefore each person in the group (a win-win approach), rather than one person winning at the expense of another losing.  This really describes the basis of mediation and collaborative process, as opposed to litigation.   It’s not about individual … read more »

Filed Under: General Tagged With: collaborative process, mediation, negotiating, win-win

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Rosenthal Law & Mediation
212.532.4704

Joy S. Rosenthal, Esq.
226 Prospect Park West #156
Brooklyn, NY 11215

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