This week, I gave a presentation to the National Association of Divorce Professionals Special Needs Chapter on the advantages of using mediation for parents of children with special needs. The biggest takeaway is that mediation can help parents create a nuanced parenting plan tailored to the specific needs of everyone in their family, whereas the litigation process may be much more rigid and limited. Parents know their children’s needs better than any lawyers or a judge ever could. So they … read more »
New Caps on Child Support and Alimony
Almost every time I go to a conference of my peers in New York State, someone comes up to me, looks at my name tag, and says, “You’re Joy Rosenthal? I can’t believe I get to meet you in person!” It makes me feel like a rock star for a second. In fact, once I was at a Continuing Legal Education class and introduced myself during the break to one of the matrimonial law judges who was teaching it. When … read more »
Helping your kids deal with difficult news
The world has changed in a week – all of the news is about grief, chaos, and fear. And even though it isn’t happening so much here, it feels very close, doesn’t it? How do we talk with our children in such a time? I wanted to share a few resources about how to talk to children about the violence in Israel and Gaza that might be helpful. Dr. Jamie Howard on CBS Morning Show (9 min video) NPR’s Becky … read more »
A Little Advice From Our Friends…
I got some amazing responses last week from parents who’ve been divorced for a while, so I’m sharing them below. Please share this with anyone who might use the advice! (Warning: this is a little long…) Strategic Holiday Allocation for the Sake of the Kids We remember the divvying up of holidays was fairly simple. Not unemotional, but we really handled it in a way that made sense for everyone, especially the kids. It was really about which holidays were … read more »
Law School 101
American law is created in two ways — by statute and by case law. Statutes are proposed and drafted by legislators for that jurisdiction, and other government rules and regulations are drafted by the agencies that are charged with running them. Most laws about family relationships are state laws. The statutes that relate to divorce, separation and children are mostly found in the New York State Domestic Relations Law (DRL) and in the Family Court Act (FCA). These are texts … read more »
Making a Better Child Support Agreement
A few months ago, I wrote a few notes about spousal maintenance. Today, I’d like to write a few notes about child support that I think are important to keep in mind. I gave a basic overview of child support last year, but I thought I would take the time to write about it again, since this is such an important part of any separation agreement. (You’re learning along with my students!) The Child Support Formula In an effort to … read more »
What’s Fair Is Fair… Or Is It?
“I only want what is equitable. That is my operating principle,” Raymond explained as he sat across from me the first time we met. His wife, Lenore, looked intensely at him. “But what you consider to be equitable is not fair to me,” she said quietly. ‘What was going on here?’ I wondered. I’d only met them for a few minutes, but I could see already that they might have some fundamental differences of opinion — in fact, they might … read more »
Divorce Made Simple
From a practical standpoint, the actual divorce process is pretty simple. What Topics Need to be Addressed? There are four or five main areas to be decided in a divorce mediation (some of which may not apply to your particular situation): 1. How will you divide up what you own together? The first step here is to identify what is separate property and what is marital. Separate property typically includes property you owned before the marriage and property you inherit. … read more »
How Much Will I Owe in Child Support?
One question that often arises in divorce is how child support is determined. We have a great, free child support calculator on our website (if I do say so, myself!) for New York that lawyers and court personnel all over the state use. The formula is a bit complicated, so I wanted to take the time to review it step by step. Both parents are responsible for supporting their children. The New York Child Support Standards Act (“CSSA”)* provides a … read more »
Can a child have 3 parents?
We all know that a child can only have 2 biological parents – a man and a woman. But we also know that biology is only a small part of the story. Every child is connected to more adults – as they say, “it takes a village to raise a child.” Many children are actually being raised by more than 2 parents — step parents, grandparents, friends and partners can play an important role in the financial and emotional … read more »