Have you ever felt like your whole world was upended? When it felt like the rug was pulled out from under your feet, and the firm ground you thought you were standing on suddenly disappeared?
It’s happened to me twice – when my first husband died suddenly in 2001, and 3 years ago when my second husband, Darryl Alladice, died in the beginning of the Covid pandemic. When some big (often unexpected) life event would happen Darryl would say, “The river bends.” Well, my river certainly has bent a few times. And perhaps it’s happened to you, too. It could be caused by a sudden death, or a divorce, an accident or a job loss… It’s like the world suddenly went from being in color to black and white, and you’ve got to rethink ALL of your assumptions.
I recently had the pleasure of being interviewed about my life transition by Linda Rossetti, whose book, Dancing With Disruption, A New Approach to Navigating Life’s Biggest Changes, was just released. I can’t wait to read it. Linda has done decades of research about how people navigate big life changes. She listened deeply as I shared what it was like to lose Darryl when Covid was at its worst in New York. And then she framed my story in the most beautiful way, helping me focus on the many gifts that the experience gave me – including a deeper sense of compassion for my students and clients. “Through transitioning, we learn to have a deeper awareness of our own voice,” she says.
I hesitated about sharing this one with you because it is so personal – I certainly don’t want to seem self-indulgent. But perhaps, if you are going through a big life transition, it will help you get through it, and to realize that even though the journey is hard, there are gifts there for you, too.