The New York Times ran an article about elder mediation and how it can be useful to adult siblings who are working together to take care of aging parents. Elder mediation can help sisters and brothers air out differences, understand each other,clarify their expectations, and approach each other with compassion so they can work together as a team. This is one of the services we offer. As it happens, I just published an article on FamilyAffaires.com describing elder mediation and … read more »
Divorce Envy ~ Who knew?
I’m honored and excited that I was quoted in Amy Sohn’s Harper’s Bazaar’s article about Divorce Envy. It really is an honor. And an interesting topic. We feel the need to keep up with the Joneses to get the latest handbag, to do hot yoga and eat kale, why not to get divorced in the most healing way possible? As I said, if it leads to a trend of collaborative process and divorce mediation, maybe peer pressure is a very … read more »
Suddenly wealthy?
Once I lived the life of a millionaire, spending my money, I didn’t care I carried my friends out for a good time, buying bootleg liquor, champagne and wine … by Ida Cox & B Feldman, sung by Bessie Smith According to the NY Times, thanks to the thriftiness of depression-era parents, baby boomers are more likely to inherit great sums of money than previous generations. Some know to expect it, others do not. What would you do if you … read more »
Let Freedom Ring
Tomorrow is the 50th anniversary of the March on Washington in which the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. gave his magnificent “I Have a Dream” speech – one of most inspiring and important speeches in history. In anticipation, I just read the full text of the speech again, and link to it here. There are some lines that we have heard over and again, and which we need to hear over and again. But there are a few others … read more »
More changing families!
In my last post (this morning), I wrote about 3 articles in today’s Sunday New York Times about interesting family configurations or trends. Well, obviously I hadn’t read the whole paper! A Father’s Day Plea to Sperm Donors is by a young man who would like, on this Father’s Day, to know who his father is; My Ex-Gay Friend explores the life of a young man who was comfortable being out, and then went back in; Living the Good Lie … read more »
Today’s Families
There are several articles in today’s NYTimes that reflect a change in today’s families, on this Father’s Day, 2011: A front page article about President Obama’s evolving views of gay marriage. Baby Makes 4, And Complications – A long and very personal portrait of a Park Slope mother, child, sperm donor/father and his partner. How Divorce Lost Its Groove, about the attitudes young people have toward divorce, and how they are trying to make it gentler on their kids — … read more »
What Makes a Good Marriage? II
Last week I started to blog about an article I read recently in the New York Times, “The Happy Marriage is the ‘Me’ Marriage,” by Tara Parker-Pope. She cites researchers who have looked at the question of what makes a marriage. A Dutch researcher, Caryl Rusbult, found that it was the “Michaelangelo effect,” – partners ‘sculpt’ each other to help them each achieve their goals. US professors, Arthur Aron and Gary Lewandowski, Jr. refer to the concept of ‘self-expansion” – … read more »
What Makes a Good Marriage
I just finished reading Elizabeth Gilbert’s new book, Committed, which is a modern look at marriage. (You know her as the author of Eat, Pray, Love). She has an interesting take on it, in part because she has an international perspective. And she delightfully weaves her personal story with more global views, much of which come from Stephanie Coontz‘ more scholarly research. Marriage for love is a relatively new phenomenon – in the past it was much more about property … read more »
Compassion and Mediation
I am taking a course this weekend from Zoketsu Norman Fisher – a Zen Buddhist priest, and a teacher of meditation. In preparation, I read an article he wrote entitled, “Developing Compassion.” He writes, “to be narrowly self-interested and self-identified is simply a very dangerous and unhappy way to live – the wider your interest and larger your sense of identity, the happier and the stronger you will be.” And this reminds me of words of my mediation teachers, Jack … read more »