Have you ever felt like your whole world was upended? When it felt like the rug was pulled out from under your feet, and the firm ground you thought you were standing on suddenly disappeared? It’s happened to me twice – when my first husband died suddenly in 2001, and 3 years ago when my second husband, Darryl Alladice, died in the beginning of the Covid pandemic. When some big (often unexpected) life event would happen Darryl would say, “The river bends.” Well, … read more »
The Fight!
My CUNY Law students had a fight in class last week. 😡 We were talking about a case that’s before the Supreme Court challenging the Indian Child Welfare Act (more about that another time) and one of the students brought up a case that’s been in the news of a US soldier who abducted an Afghani baby girl. Another student said, “There’s an argument to be made that a girl will have a better upbringing in the US than in … read more »
High conflict couple + Mediation = Wha???
I’ve done 2 great interviews in the last few weeks! The first was an amazing podcast interview with Andrea Rappaport and Morgan Stogsdill, Esq. on their podcast, How Not to Suck at Divorce. They were curious about how I handle mediations with high conflict couples. I told them that you don’t have to agree on any of the substantive stuff – only that you will each come to mediation in good faith. And we talked about 3 action steps that you can take while … read more »
Sometimes Hope is In a Cowbell.
Remember three years ago, when the shutdown happened and we were hiding in our apartments, scared to go outside… Scared to breathe on each other. Scared to go to the grocery store. Scared we were going to run out of toilet paper. (smile). Remember all of that? I sat down to watch Jeopardy! the other day, noticing that it was light out because of Daylight Savings Time. I looked at the cow bell and the pliers still sitting on the shelf … read more »
AMAZING! THINGS ARE HAPPENING HERE!
You might have seen the signs around NY Presbyterian Hospital that say AMAZING THINGS ARE HAPPENING HERE. My dad, who was a great neurologist (and Grammarian-in-Chief) at their hospital on 168th and Broadway, used to joke that they forgot the ! after the word AMAZING. Get it? (smile) Well, I’m as amazed as anyone else at what’s gone on this week. We had a lively discussion on my workshop, 3 Sure-fire Ways to Save Time, Stress and $$$ on Your Divorce. I appeared on … read more »
If your spouse is a louse…
If your spouse is a louse I’ll get you the house. That Dr. Seuss-like saying was the on the business card of a litigator I met at my first training on collaborative law. While his card was memorable (that was over 16 years ago), alas, his name was not. (I just googled the saying to see if I could find his name and came up with a lot of information about head lice. Hah.) That little diddy is funny, but … read more »
The High Cost of Divorce
I teach family law at CUNY Law School and the semester started a few weeks ago. Here I was on the first day back (hat hair and all): This week, I brought in a well-respected colleague as a guest to talk about how a contested divorce moves through the court system. He told the students about discovery demands and motion practice and preliminary conferences and a lot of time-consuming stuff. And then he mentioned his hourly rate, and there was an audible gasp … read more »
Who Made the Pie?
When I was in law school, I was active in an organization called PILA – the Public Interest Law Association. We raised money to sponsor paid summer internships for our fellow students to work at legal nonprofits. We would bake casseroles and sell lunch outside of faculty meetings and hold a yearly auction – real grassroots stuff. Then one year, my friend, Mary Marrow suggested that we hold a Thanksgiving pie sale. I was living in an apartment on 114th … read more »
Compassionate lawyer??? Wha??
Compassionate lawyer??? Doesn’t that sound like an oxymoron? How do those 2 words go together? I’m learning about branding. That is my new tag. OK, let’s take a step back. In one of my past lives, when I was young and was trying to figure out how to make a positive impact on the world, I studied world religions in the Masters program at Harvard Divinity School. Although it was an amazing experience in many ways, I couldn’t figure out … read more »
PS – Thanks for the Invitation!
I’ve taken to watching TikTok videos to wind down before I go to sleep. I love the music and the stupid dad jokes and the dancing and the cute dog videos (have you seen scruffabella?). But I’ve also started watching Cory Booker, who shares stories about kindness and compassion after his morning run. This video is about 9 seconds. It’s for those among us who are confronted by people who get on our last nerve. For those who spend time … read more »
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