I’ve been watching a lot of videos of Tina Turner this week. She is so awesome. Other people seem to be focusing on her voice or her hits or her legs or her hair, but I’m focusing on how she kept reinventing her life and writing her own ticket for how she wanted to live. She didn’t let society (or Ike) limit who she was. She didn’t let trauma define her. I want to be like Tina. I want us … read more »
How to Win at Divorce (and Life) … IMHO
A few weeks ago, I attended an online conference called “How to Win At Divorce.” This seemed like a strange proposition. After all, what does it mean to “win” at divorce?? Honestly, I thought the presentations would all be about how to get as much out of your ex as possible, positioning them as the enemy. Thankfully, that’s not what they did. But it made me really think about the question. (Ok, I just asked Chat GPT how to win … read more »
The River Bends
Have you ever felt like your whole world was upended? When it felt like the rug was pulled out from under your feet, and the firm ground you thought you were standing on suddenly disappeared? It’s happened to me twice – when my first husband died suddenly in 2001, and 3 years ago when my second husband, Darryl Alladice, died in the beginning of the Covid pandemic. When some big (often unexpected) life event would happen Darryl would say, “The river bends.” Well, … read more »
AMAZING! THINGS ARE HAPPENING HERE!
You might have seen the signs around NY Presbyterian Hospital that say AMAZING THINGS ARE HAPPENING HERE. My dad, who was a great neurologist (and Grammarian-in-Chief) at their hospital on 168th and Broadway, used to joke that they forgot the ! after the word AMAZING. Get it? (smile) Well, I’m as amazed as anyone else at what’s gone on this week. We had a lively discussion on my workshop, 3 Sure-fire Ways to Save Time, Stress and $$$ on Your Divorce. I appeared on … read more »
Who’s Your Mama?
Who’s your mama? Seem like a stupid question, doesn’t it? Well, wait til you take family law with me! I’ll have your head spinning. Here’s the synopsis of a case we read this week. (True story!) Dawn and Michael were married and lived out in Long Island. They tried to have kids, but had difficulty conceiving. A few years later, they became a throuple with Audria, who moved in with them. The 3 of them planned and to have and … read more »
If your spouse is a louse…
If your spouse is a louse I’ll get you the house. That Dr. Seuss-like saying was the on the business card of a litigator I met at my first training on collaborative law. While his card was memorable (that was over 16 years ago), alas, his name was not. (I just googled the saying to see if I could find his name and came up with a lot of information about head lice. Hah.) That little diddy is funny, but … read more »
The High Cost of Divorce
I teach family law at CUNY Law School and the semester started a few weeks ago. Here I was on the first day back (hat hair and all): This week, I brought in a well-respected colleague as a guest to talk about how a contested divorce moves through the court system. He told the students about discovery demands and motion practice and preliminary conferences and a lot of time-consuming stuff. And then he mentioned his hourly rate, and there was an audible gasp … read more »
Compassionate lawyer??? Wha??
Compassionate lawyer??? Doesn’t that sound like an oxymoron? How do those 2 words go together? I’m learning about branding. That is my new tag. OK, let’s take a step back. In one of my past lives, when I was young and was trying to figure out how to make a positive impact on the world, I studied world religions in the Masters program at Harvard Divinity School. Although it was an amazing experience in many ways, I couldn’t figure out … read more »
PS – Thanks for the Invitation!
I’ve taken to watching TikTok videos to wind down before I go to sleep. I love the music and the stupid dad jokes and the dancing and the cute dog videos (have you seen scruffabella?). But I’ve also started watching Cory Booker, who shares stories about kindness and compassion after his morning run. This video is about 9 seconds. It’s for those among us who are confronted by people who get on our last nerve. For those who spend time … read more »
When One Door Closes…
I am helping a friend move out of her house this week. She is packing up her big house to move to an apartment far away. The move makes sense in so many ways, and she knows it, but that doesn’t make it easier. I take down her family photos so she doesn’t have to remember so many moments. A set of dishes goes into storage in wait for her daughter. So do the teddy bears and the favorite books. … read more »
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